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Tuesday, January 4th, 2011
9:05 am
It's just so cliche
That is, starting the year off with the resolution of "lose weight."  You know, I always say I don't "do" resolutions, but I do set goals for myself.  But really, why make goals and then don't resolve to achieve them?  It's really just semantics, isn't it?  I don't resolve to be perfect on the way, but I do resolve to achieve my goal regardless.

SO.  I've done goals before, but I'm doing it a little differently this time.  There is this website/podcast that I was introduced to called www.fat2fitradio.com.  The hosts are two men, one who is a fitness professional, and one who is an obese man working on losing weight.  They do a weekly podcast, and you can either listen to it online or on iTunes.  It's interesting to listen to, because you get perspectives from both sides: advice from the professional and real-time personal experience from the novice.  Certainly, with as long as I've been working on my weight and health, there isn't a lot of information on the podcasts that is new to me, although yes, there is a bit of it.  But it's always good to be reminded of things, and to hear it in a different format.

Their current podcast is about achieving goals.  There's one little bit that was so interesting to me.  They spoke about some studies that had been done on goal-setting.  One was a study of recent Yale University graduates.  They polled the students to see how many of them had clearly written goals.  Only 3% of the class had specific written goals.  20 years later, they checked in on the graduates.  The 3% that had clearly written goals were worth more than the other 97% of the class combined.  (Not sure how they accounted for those they couldn't locate or who had passed on.)  Another study was of Harvard Business School graduates in 1979.  3% had clearly written goals, 13% had goals, but not written down, and the other 84% had no clear goals.  10 years later, the 13% of those with unwritten goals made twice as much money as the 84% without goals.  The 3% that had clearly written goals made 10 times more than each of the other 97%.

The podcast goes on to say that not only is it important to set big major goals and little daily goals, but also 3-month goals to work toward.  I've followed this advice, and it gives me an interim goal to reach, which I expect to help me stay motivated.  It's a big goal, but not so big that it is too daunting to even start working toward.

I've set my goals for this week, and so far I've been staying on track to reach those goals.  I've already lost 4 lbs. since the new year, and I know some of that is water weight, but I'm perfectly fine with that.  I don't expect to keep up at that rate, especially since I'm not really working out as often as I need to because the kids are still on winter break, and will be until Jan. 12.  But I do expect to do a decent walk 2-3 times this week.  (I've done a long walk once, and I was able to take the dog on a 30 minute walk last night.)  Eating has been good.  Not perfect, but I'm staying within my calorie range.  Oh, that is one thing I'm doing differently.  I've got my calorie level 150 calories above my usual weight loss level, and I think that is helping me mentally stay more on track.  I have room for an extra snack, or even a more substantial snack than usual.

Friday, June 4th, 2010
10:02 am

No E.

B: shredded wheat, coffee
S: almonds
L: rice, beans, veggies, sweet tea
D: Yaki soba, cookies, ice cream. Beer.

But, I did portion control and I went to bed hungry.

I have a cold today so I skipped my hardcore kickboxing class this morning. Will try to do a lighter workout this afternoon. I'm in the sneezy, sniffly stage and it's disgusting.

B: ham/eggs scramble, coffee, a couple slices of peach.
L: leftover yaki soba (noodles, seasoning, kale, green beans, egg, chicken sausage, a little bacon, cilantro, onions)
D: pizza and salad, beer.
8:33 pm
What Happened?
I was doing so well, and I just ate like shit tonight.  I didn't ever feel deprived, but for some reason, I took on a "one night isn't going to kill me."  Which it's not, but I also ate crap at lunch, and now I've got a headache to end all headaches, and I'm cramping up a bit.  Lesson learned.  And with all the sodium I had today, I can guarantee I'm going to be bloated beyond belief tomorrow.

Tomorrow is another day.  But here was today:

B: 2 scrambled eggs w/ salsa and lf cheese; apple; milk
S: almonds; banana
L: 3 of Hannah's chicken nuggets; carrot sticks; corn crisps w/ hummus
D: dim sum
8:02 am
Back on the wagon
Last weekend was my bday weekend, and wow did we celebrate.  Went to my parent's house and ate and drank like it was my birthday for 3 days straight!  But it sure was fun.

Today we didn't meet for boot camp so I made up my own.  I went solid for 65 minutes - whew!  Here's what I did:
8:30 warm-up jog
2x(10 walking lunges, 10 long jumps, 10 military pushups, 10 fire hydrants/leg, 10 yard sales, 10 squats), then 400 yard run w/ big hill climb - did all this 4 times through
8:30 cool-down jog

I was covered in grass and sweat by the end of this workout.

Today will be a challenge - eating out twice.  But I started off good.
Pre-workout - banana
B: 1 slice high-fiber bread, 1 egg, cheddar cheese, mixed fruit
Tuesday, June 1st, 2010
9:50 pm
Oh Me Oh My

B: 2 fried eggs, coffee

S: a couple grapes

L: 2 "sushi" rolls, 1,789 cookies at 30 calories each. A Coke.

D: 5 Joe-Joes, 2 bean/rice/cheese/lettuce/tom, etc burritos. Ice cream with chocolate sauce.

E: Bootcamp.

My bootcamp today was brutal. Brutal. Brutal. I can hardly walk. It was a sub instructor and she showed no mercy. I am broken. It was awesome. And my kids must be getting sick or something. They were awful all day. I didn't get lunch until 3pm or so, and I was half dehydrated and starved by then after said bootcamp, and I used it as an excuse to make horrible choices.


B: yogurt with fresh fruit and honey

L: bean/cheese/sour cream/tomato/lettuce/cucumber/corn/rice salad

D: yaki soba with kale, green beans, carrots, cilantro, and bacon. Probably some ice cream.

E: Treadmill and weights.

On a purely philosophical level, I think I have figured out my horrible eating. I had a week of pure debauchery, food wise. I am terrified of the scale. I ate a lot of really fatty, caloric things - donuts, brownies, steak, loaded baked potatoes. And I ate until I was full. I really overdid.

And I think it is because I say "no" to myself all the time. About everything. I am struggling dealing with the demands of my two little ones who seem to have an endless pit of need. Which is not to say I am not enamored with them or anything, but I have no breaks. I have no relief. I cannot say what I WANT to say to them. I cannot do what I want to do because everything revolves around them and their strange preschooler minds. I cannot shop because we are scraping pennies. We cannot go anywhere because it's probably not in the budget. I am always censoring myself. And I finally just let go this week and ate what I wanted. As much as I wanted. Usually my diet is easy because I save all the best of everything for the kids. This week I bought stuff for myself to eat and didn't share.

I need to find other ways to say "yes" to myself.
Monday, May 31st, 2010
3:51 pm
Monday for Dana
Man, it's been a while since I've been here.

So in my last entry, I had given up sugar, and was moving on to dairy.  Well, the first day off of dairy, I started craving sugar like crazy!  I gave it a couple more days, but it just wasn't working.  I talked to my doctor about it, and she suggested going off gluten instead, and doing dairy later.  I thought for sure it would be really hard.  But honestly, it hasnt been bad.  I went off it last Wednesday, and although I'm starting to get bored with eating the same old stuff for breakfast and lunch, I don't have any sugar cravings.  I've just got to do some research and mix it up a bit.  I'm eating way too much fruit too.  SweetCoalminer, you had to go gluten free once, right?  Or you chose to?  Any tips for me?

Anyway, here's today so far, and the plan for tonight:

B: 2 egg omelet w/ onions, green peppers, mushrooms, and a 1/2 oz. of cheese
S: grapes; 1 oz. cheese
L: apple & natural pb, hard boiled egg
S: carrots w/ hummus
D: steak, baked potatoes, roasted brussels sprouts

Starting weight/current weight/goal weight: 169/163/130

Still no exercise.  It's been tough to fit in.  Scott leaves early and comes home late, Hannah doesn't like the stroller anymore so it's hard to go walking during the day, and if I try to do a video in the mornings, the kids ALWAYS wake up and pester me.  But I'm doing okay.  I'm down 6 lbs. from the heaviest I've been since arriving here, so that's good.  And I'll have whole days free to work out when Hannah starts school in August!  2 more months.  2 more months.
Monday, May 24th, 2010
8:00 pm
I cannot believe I have done zero meal planning for tomorrow and I forgot to order our csa box.


E: 30 treadmill
B: 2 eggs, coffee
L: small bowl spaghetti, small piece of hortopita
S: Almond joy
D: beets, kale with bacon, mudd pie.

Not really the most balanced dy. A little extreme - veggies and sweets.
Sunday, May 23rd, 2010
8:59 am
Yesterday in Review -
B: 2 scrambled cheese eggs, fruit
E: 45 min boot camp
L: 1/2 turkey Reuben on rye, 1/4 c. quinua salad, couple bites of pumpkin/chocolate chip bread & energy bar from Great Harvest Bread
S: other 1/2 of sandwich, cherries, 1/3 energy bar from Great Harvest
D: 1 beef brat on WW bun, sweet potato w/ sour cream & feta cheese
S: blueberries, strawberries, blackberries

There were a few too many nibbles in there yesterday.  I blame the goods I got from Great Harvest.  Their stuff is so good!

Today -
S: 1/3 PB energy bar from Great Harvest, 1/2 c. OJ
E: 4.5 mile run
S: Smoothie (1 c. plain kefir, 1/3 c. plain yogurt, 1 c. frozen cherries, 1 banana, 1/2 scoop chocolate protein powder) (this was the BOMB!  sooooo good after my hot run!)
E: 90 min hot power yoga
L: Big salad w/ lots of veggies and tuna
S: popcorn?
D: either salmon or grilled chicken and broccoli, blueberries and blackberries for dessert

My goal for today is to cut out the extra nibbles.  If it goes in my mouth, I've got to write it down.
Saturday, May 22nd, 2010
9:57 am
Saturday and recap

B: 2 eggs, coffee
E: Bootcamp/kickboxing. I felt like I was going to THROW UP for two hours after class. The kids played on the playground at the Y afterward, and I couldn't even stand around watching them. I climbed up on the play structure and laid down on it. From sheer exertion. That class kicked my ass 5 ways from sunday.

L: pb (fresh homemade - the kids and I processed a big bag of peanuts) and jelly sandwich, ice cream.
S: handful of goldfish crackers
D: salad, pizza.

Not really such a great eating day. The kids didn't have any veggies at all and only a banana for fruit.


No exercise - I'm still dying from yesterday and there's no time.

B: shredded wheat, skim milk, coffee
L: pizza and salad leftovers, beets and beet greens.
D: hortopita and tiropita that I am hoping to make this afternoon if I can get all my greens boiled.
9:08 am
Ended up going out to dindin to our favorite steak/seafood place last night.  Mmmmm it was soooo good.  I made a healthy choice for dinner, and got dessert.  And 2 glasses of wine.  Yeah...abstinent May kind of ended last weekend at my friend's bday party, but I'm okay with that.  A glass of wine here and there is okay - 2-3 times a week, not okay.

Yesterday in review -
S (5:30am - before workouts) - Homemade banana nut muffin
B (7:30am) - 1/2 c. oatmeal, 1 tbsp PB, banana, coffee w/ cream
S (10am) - veggie omelet
L - Salad w/ leftovers from last night (ground beef w/ taco seasoning - lots of veggies)
S - Apple, string cheese, 1 Wasa cracker
D - 2 pieces yummy bread, 4 oysters on crackers, 8 steamed deep-water shrimp (tasted like lobster - so good!), side of steamed veggies in olive oil, the most awesome warm pineapple polenta cake w/ pineapple ice cream (soooooooo good), 2 glasses of wine

We have boot cam today at the gym.  I will have to do the extra workout at the end for my naughtiness last night, but it was worth it.

Plan for today -
B: Fruit, 2 scrambled eggs w/ cheese, coffee w/ cream
E: Boot camp, maybe a little run w/ the dog afterward
L: Smoothie (plain kefir, plain yogurt, berries, banana, protein powder)
S: Greek yogurt w/ mixed berries sprinkled w/ Ezekiel cereal
D: Beef brat, sweet potato, cherries
Friday, May 21st, 2010
10:08 am
Woke up at 5:10am to rain, but they say boot camp is rain or shine.  Just as I was heading out the door to go, I heard my email alert ding.  Sure enough - they canceled due to thunder/lightening.  Booooo!  So I did Level 1 of Jillian's 30 Day Shred, a 5 minute boot-camp type workout that they gave us in our "homework" section of our log, and 30 minutes of yoga.  Yay me!  But I am so tired today.  I think it's catching up to me.  I need to sleeeeeeep this weekend!

I've been starving today - I think it's because I didn't eat enough protein this AM - just 1 tbsp. of PB, which isn't enough.  I just devoured a veggie omelet from the cafeteria downstairs, so I think that will hold me for a while.

S (5:30am - before workouts) - Homemade banana nut muffin
B (7:30am) - 1/2 c. oatmeal, 1 tbsp PB, banana, coffee w/ cream
S (10am) - veggie omelet
L - Salad w/ leftovers from last night (ground beef w/ taco seasoning - lots of veggies)
S - Apple, yogurt
D - 1 beef brat, sweet potato w/ sour cream & parmesan cheese, cherries

Depending on what time I get out of here today, I might throw in a quick run when I get home.  But it is Friday, so that just might not happen :)
Thursday, May 20th, 2010
8:50 pm
Going strong!
Yesterday was totally rockin - I stuck to the plan all day.  Had to work until close to midnight last night but I still got up at 5am for boot camp today.  I can just tell this is going to be so good for me - I NEED that commitment to get me out of bed in the morning.  And I got the Camp Champ award today (and a little trophy!) for my hard work.  I am such an over-achiever - even at boot camp :)

Today -
E: Boot camp
B: Smoothie (plain kefir, plain yogurt, mixed berries, protein powder)
S: Mixed nuts, raisins
L: WW sandwich thin w/ chicken & swiss, fruit
S: Greek yogurt, mixed berries and sprinkled with Ezekiel cereal
D: Salad (greens, tomatoes, cucumber, mushrooms, onions, red and green pepper) w/ ground beef & taco seasoning, salsa, black beans, cheese, cherries

Boot camp again tomorrow morning - bright and early!!
11:27 am
A good day
Yesterday I ate lightly and well with the food, but heavy on the sweets as I tend to do when I am beat down by the kids.

Today: Greek yogurt with frozen blueberries, granola and honey.

L: lentils with vinegar, beets and beet greens, feta, bread

D: lentils, bread, feta, salad. Ice cream - who am I kidding.

My CSA box has more fava beans nd artichokes. Delicious, but SO TIME CONSUMING!

E: I only got a 20-minute jog in this morning, but I got my heartrate up. We were running really late, but at least I went. I actually got a good sweat on.
Wednesday, May 19th, 2010
7:41 am
Hump Day!
Weigh In - 155.4 (+1.2...boo!  I guess not working out for a week solid will do that to you.)

I joined a 4 week boot camp yesterday.  It started this morning.  I have had the hardest time finding my own motivation to workout, so I figured plunking down some cash and having some accountability would help.  It was actually pretty fun - I think this will be good for me.  And I have to keep a food log, which they check every morning...there's punishment (more exercise) if you eat poorly.

Plan for today -
Pre-workout - Greek yogurt (bad choice - felt like I was going to puke.)
B: 1 scrambled egg w/ cheese, sour cream, salsa, black beans in multi-grain wrap, coffee w/ cream
S: Apple, string cheese
L: WW sandwich thin w/ BBQ chicken, Swiss & avocado, mixed fruit
S: Mixed nuts, dried apricots
D: Salad w/ fajita stuff (beef, avocado, salsa, sour cream, black beans), cherries
Tuesday, May 18th, 2010
11:28 am
Not terrific
It's been a rough week and I'm medicating with milk chocolate.

B: shredded wheat, coffee

S: chocolate

L: leftover gross, nasty thai food. Maybe a salad.

D: Sushi (homemade) and probably more gross thai leftovers. yuck.

E: Bootcamp. It kicked my ass.

We went to a party on Sunday at the park and either the dip for the veggies was bad (frank and I went down, and Cory ate a ton of sausages and was fine) or we had a virus. I was too sick to cook last night so we ordered thai. Yuck.
Monday, May 17th, 2010
2:50 pm
Monday for Dana

So.  After meeting with my new OB, we determined that my next steps in helping my health are 1) hormone test, 2) switch to organic foods where possible, and 3) start eliminating things from my diet.  The hormone test is Friday, I am slowly eating more organic foods as I get used to the price (!), and I immediately cut out sugar.  That was 2 1/2 weeks ago, and I'm still going strong.  The rest of my diet is still not stellar, but one thing at a time.

Now, I haven't cut out all sugar.  Fruit is still on the menu, of course, but I'm also still eating baked goods and some sauces.  I will eventually get to those.  But just cutting out excess sugar (including artificial sweeteners) has made a huge difference in my mood and energy level.  There have been hard moments, especially in the mornings when I've always had a cup of coffee w/ cream and sweetener.  And occasionally in the afternoons when I get antsy and anxious.  But for the most part, it's been pretty easy so far.  Even through the cake baking class I was taking, I was able to take just one small taste of each cake, just to check the quality, and had no desire to eat more.  The only slip up I've had was last night.  For some reason I just grabbed a couple of Oreos from Scott's stash, and 15 minutes later I felt so sick.  Makes it much easier to keep it out of my diet.

Today I decided to go to the next elimination, so I'm trying dairy.  This will be a very hard one, seeing that I have milk just about every morning in some capacity, and cheese on a regular basis.  But it's almost 3 in the afternoon and I've done well so far.  So here's today's plan:

B: hard boiled egg; ww toast w/ natural organic pb & all-fruit spread; herbal tea

S: apple

L: chili w/ salad

~~~done through here~~~

S: carrots; 1/2 pb sandwich

D: chicken schnitzel w/ marinara, spaghetti, salad (basically chicken parmesan without the parmesan)

S: banana

E: probably none, other than walking the dog, but may try for a short walk
Friday, May 14th, 2010
12:45 pm
So I did bootcamp this morning and it was HARD. We partnered up and did 60 seconds of people throwing our feet down crunches. Youch. I always feel great, though, after working out. And I befriended another mom there who has 2 kids and they played together after. Fun!

I had a nice healthy salad for dinner last night and again for lunch, but we have white oreos in the hizzouse and I need to stop eating them like sunflower seeds.

Not a fantastic week, all said and done, but not as horrible as those in recent memory. My eating has been reasonable. I think that not sitting down to dinner with the kids is actually going to be very good for my weight.
Wednesday, May 12th, 2010
12:48 pm
May 12
Weigh In - 154.0 (so I gained a pound overnight?  blasted scale!  and damn that cookie cake!!!)

Today so far -
B: Oatmeal, PB, banana, milk
L: 1/2 turkey & swiss on WW bun, salad, fruit salad, 1 cookie (but that's it!)

I have some strawberries and pineapple for later - maybe I'll have some string cheese, too, for the protein.  Must workout tonight - I think I will get home in time to go ride my bike outside.  Eeeekkk - I have not ridden outside in like 2 months, ever since I gave up triathlons this season.  But as the saying goes, it's like riding a bike, right??!!  Also need some stretchy-stretch yoga afterwards.  More chicken/veggies for dinner.  No ice cream tonight.
9:39 am
I was all set and had the kids' park bag ready to go early to walk to school with Frank, but I have awful cramps, even after the ibuprofen. I'm going to pass on exercise today.

I did pretty well yesterday and went to bed hungry. I'm sad about not getting to walk today and suspect a walk at my own pace would even make me feel better, but a walk with a stroller, a bicycle and a scooter and two (if not three - our neighbor's kid almost always comes with us when we walk) kids who don't listen for shit would just make me miserable and depressed, and I'm glad I recognized that.

I did ok last night - I made Greek meatballs, zucchini balls, and fries with pita and tzatziki, and I did a good job controlling my eating, although I did falter and clean up Frank's plate. It kills me how they waste the food I work so hard to make.

I'm going to aim for an exercise-free day and go to bed hungry.
Tuesday, May 11th, 2010
9:24 pm
May 11
Sooooo today didn't go exactly as planned.  I laid in bed and hit snooze for an hour instead of working out.  Meh. 

Food was like this -
B: 2 scrambled eggs w/ cheese, pinto beans, salsa, sour cream, strawberries
S: cashews and almonds (that were stale!) and a couple dried apricots
L: 1/2 grilled chicken sandwich, salad, fruit, 1 cookie and 1 smallish brownie
S: freaking cookie cake (damn work!), pretzels w/ laughing cow cheese, 1/2 smoothie
E: 4 mile run, 30 min strength training
D: leftover chicken/veggies, ice cream

Helllloooooooooo, too much sugar sugar!  How you, doin'?  Can we say PMS+stress=I will put anything with sugar in my mouth?  Well, at least I worked out.

Tomorrow I will try to avoid cookies and sugar - today was more than enough.  And you know what I think triggered part of it?  I weighed in today (a day early) and saw 153 on the scale!  153!  Down 2.2 pounds from last Wednesday!  So I thought I had some room to be bad today.  The scale is evil.  Even when I see good stuff I just use it as a license to be bad.  Maybe I should just weigh in once a month?  Or once every 2 weeks?

Need to do yoga and some cardio tomorrow.
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